My problem is not that I don’t have anything to blog about, but rather, I have SO MUCH to blog about that I am rendered incapable of blogging at all. Thus, the events and topics pile up and I get frozen in a loop of wanting to blog but not knowing where to start.
Well, no one has ever accused me of being short on words, and when I get an idea I tend to be a bit stubborn. I don’t want to give up on that blog entry! But then something else happens, and something else, and it spirals out of control.
The solution, of course, is to write. Not about all the events and topics I have thought about posting about, no, that would be to logical (and waaayyy to time consuming). Instead I will write about my posting dilemma. This simultaneously negates and exacerbates my problem. While on the one hand, posting anything at all is liberating me from:
I CANT POSSIBLY POST THIS UNTIL I POSTED ABOUT THAT BUT IF I POST ABOUT THAT I MUST POST ABOUT THIS OTHER THING FIRST.
On the other hand, it is really just extending my posting procrastination as it pertains to the actual happenings or thoughts that have occurred. Either way, I’m screwed.
The upside is, this is my blog and I can do what I want. I have no obligation to post about certain things right when they happen! I have thoughts and opinions and experiences to share, but sharing doesn’t have to happen RIGHT THIS SECOND.
And this, my dear readers, is precisely my style of procrastination. Mix of ADHD distractibility with Anxiety Disorder induced panicking that I won’t get everything done and poof! Stress with a side of binge-watching tv shows.
Luckily, the anxiety inevitably wins out and I finish whatever I have been putting of, usually with time to spare. Thus, I have procrastinated and yet, I have not. Procrastination perfected.
I knew it was time to stop procrastinating when I started having the dreams. Whenever I am putting something off for to long I have stress dreams that always contain the same three elements.
- I have to go/move somewhere far away right that minute and
- I haven’t packed. It is time to go and NOTHING IS PACKED!!
- My sister is yelling at me to hurry up OR yelling at me about the fact I have nothing packed OR yelling at me in general.
The settings/trips/what is actually going on changes, but those three elements stay the same. And when I start having those dreams, I know it is time to get a movin’ on whatever I have been putting off (usually packing oddly enough, I am quite the literal dreamer).
To cross blog entry off that to-do list here is a highlights reel of what has been happening in my life/random thoughts/other things, that I may or may not expand upon in the future. Pictures included when applicable.
My Grandmother turned 100 years old last monday (may 5)
I have a new baby cousin (as of this morning!)
My whole paternal side of the family was in town for said grandmother’s birthday party (here are me and my sibs)
My dad (who was born on his mother’s birthday) also had a birthday.
I am learning how to pick locks (for fun!)
I have been on multiple dates with two specific men. One from the internet, one from the science fair.
I had the necessary ‘returning stuff to the ex’ meet up
I chipped my front tooth by wearing my new night-gaurd and had to get it filled in with fake tooth (hilarious story. really. Ask me about it.)
I had a wonderful day in the sun
I am midway through my second to last week at ILABS
I have 3.6 weeks until I head to northampton
I have to move
Now that the chaos from the family whirlwind is over I can finally take some time to focus on these important facts:
- I have to move
- I have to read all of the ‘suggested’ reading articles for the first week of class
- I have to move
- I have to wrap up things at work and clear out
- I have to move
As you can see there is one particular issue I am struggling to grasp. And thus, the dreams.
I know I can get it all done( just as soon as that panic kicks in) 😀